Insights on Yoga and Life at 35

A little over a month after my 35th birthday, here are a few reflections

Yoga is not a one-stop solution for everything. Just as I would not address lower-back pain on its own, Yoga is not my default answer to every issue. There is currently a huge Yoga trend suggesting it can fix, if not cure, anxiety, trauma and depression.

Please do not misunderstand me: Yoga is an extraordinary tool. It can be preventative, complementary and supportive in managing treatment for anxiety, trauma and depression. Let it serve all of those purposes, but be careful not to prescribe to others what worked for you while overlooking how individual and unique we each are.

An integrated approach is always best. Western medicine is not the enemy.

Ageing, appearance and consistency

The pressure is real: Botox, Dermapen, fillers, meso-something therapy and fat freezing, to name only a few. I feel as though I am becoming the easy target for marketing lines such as: avoid fine lines, reduce the signs of ageing.

Nothing supports anti-ageing better than consistency: regular exercise that is moderate rather than extreme, plenty of water, and nutritious fresh food. Keep preservatives, caffeine and alcohol to a minimum.

This is me. A touch of mascara, and, if you are lucky, my highlights and eyebrows will be up to date. My toenails are often painted too. Otherwise, what you see is what you get.

My body is changing.

The way I want to move and exercise has changed.

During my twenties, I wanted to kick, punch, jump, sprint and lift heavy weights. I still do those things, just less frequently. Now, I also want to breathe, meditate and enjoy lavish restorative Yoga classes. Essentially, I want to feel calm and treat my body with more kindness.

Independence, grief and being human

I do not have children. Yes, I am 35. I have been married for four years and have not had a baby yet. It is not because I do not want one, nor because I do not believe it appears to be the most extraordinary journey of personal growth and letting go. Rather, at 35, I feel that I have only just found my voice, found my path and understood the delicate balance of putting myself first. For now, I do not want to lose that independence, my gypsy spirit.

The way I think and communicate is much clearer. Perhaps that comes from a mixture of confidence, maturity and the knocks life delivers along the way.

Grief never completely leaves you. People say that time heals every wound. That is not wholly true. Of course, you learn how to cope and adjust. Yet even on your happiest, most joyful occasions, it remains there. The greatest gift grief gave me was empathy.

Accept your human self and your human experiences. We are all human beings, I hope. So why are we trying to over-enlighten ourselves? Be here; be entirely present. Investigate every part of yourself. Lose yourself in the moment. Do not punish yourself for poor decisions, selfish moments or anger.

You do not need to get it right every time.

Travel is the best thing you can do for yourself. Travel more, travel often, travel alone, or travel with a lover, friends or family. But travel.

I do not believe in coincidence. Stay alert to the subtle, precious moments. Everyday life contains whispers of wisdom. Allow yourself to hear them. Share some, but keep a few just for yourself.

No-one has it all worked out. Do not be afraid to believe in yourself.